is God in control?

This question is too big for me.  I cannot answer it.  But here is what I see today:

• A child (14 years old) dies in Bangladesh after being accused of having an affair with a married man and sentenced to 100 lashes.
• Tear gas and molotov cocktails are used to quell protesters in Cairo.
• A boy's body is found in a canal after being abducted by his father.
• Superbowl weekend is America's biggest sex trafficking weekend.

These are just a few, very few, of the headlines today.  So is God in control?  My immediate gut response is, "I hope not." 

There is too much pain and suffering and injustice and screwed-up-ness for me to accept that God is orchestrating all of the details. 

But where, then, is God?  Where is God for these mothers whose mourning is too much to bear?  Where is God for the protesters losing their lives in the fight for justice?  Where is God for the exploited?  Where is God for the men and women, girls and boys, who face tragedies large and small that never make headlines? 

I trust, truly I do, that God is there in the midst of them all.  But is He in control?  Not of the details.  Surely not.

And yet, and yet...God is IN the details.  God is in the sly smile of a small boy.  God is in the wrinkles of an elderly couple holding hands.  God is in the rippling waves of a prairie morning.  God is in the hand reaching out to lift up.  God is in the sparkling wings of a Japanese beetle.  God is in the loud cackle of a passionate girl.  God is IN....

I don't know the right theological answers to the question of the God's control.  I have heard it said many times: "God only gives you as much as you can bear." I don't believe that. Not for a second. There are some things that are too much for us to bear.
But my God is a God who knows suffering.  Who knows rejection and betrayal and pain and death.  And so because He knows, I will trust.  Little by little I will reach for trust. 
 
I don't know how much control God has.  But I do know God cares and understands and weeps and creates and creates again.  I know that when life is too much to bear, I don't have to bear it alone.  And I know that gifts of beauty and hope and courage are still given - more than I notice. 
 
So as I continue my 1000 Gifts list, here are a few I notice today:

• a cowlick that refuses to lie down
• undaunted sparkle in blue eyes
• unexpected sunshine
• clean dishes
• hope that leads to courage (Egypt)
• bear hugs
• learning a new skill, step by step
• heat that can be turned on with a switch
• telephones to hear far-away voices
• kind words of encouragement