free like God

photo © 2009 Scarleth White (via: Wylio)
A good, good friend sent me this quote:

"To live no tight, neat role is truly sacrificial, it is also truly creative because it leaves us open and free (dare we say) like God himself." (from Alan Jones, dean of the Cathedral of San Francisco)



The quote comes from a Eugene Patterson book (The Pastor) that I haven't read, but it's in reference to his wife, who lived her calling as a pastor's wife with "no tight, neat role."  I tend to approach this lack of role as a burden, or a trial to be overcome.  I tend to feel "less than" since I can't claim a particular vocation (including SAHM).  But I have never, not once, considered that this makes me "free like God." 
 
But I can see how in some ways it does.  Though I do have roles that limit my freedom - office-worker, mom - I have a lot more daily freedom than many in this world.  I am free to:

• make home-cooked meals, or not, as I desire.
• work on knitting and sewing, or not, as I desire.
• write a blog!
• make praying the divine hours (and praying in color) a practice that I can do at work.
• spend regular time with My Girl and her neighbor friend, who thinks it's "really weird" that I make bread.
• play Candyland and Zingo and Memory over and over and over.
• read books.  Lots and lots of books.
• read blogs.  Lots and lots of blogs :).
• start a book club, or not, as I desire.
• do small acts of service.
• sleep, or not (the "not" is most likely when I have my nose in a book I can't put down).
• clean, or not (mostly not).
• play with my children.
• visit a friend.

I have lots of freedom.  Sometimes I wish that freedom were more limited, that my life were more defined.  I can get overwhelmed by choice and lean toward "stuckness."  But I'm learning to value my freedom as a gift.  A gift to be (dare I say) like God.